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Still Fat... Still Pretty....Still ME

Somewhere along the way I lost my motivation but 2 days back in and I think that maybe I have found it again. I'm really hoping that I keep it. Trying to remember that as hard as it is to diet the reward will be wonderful..  
                                             Mission- Fat2Fit
                                             Goal: Healthy by 30

 
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Just Me

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Weight update...life update

So .... my weight is the same I have not lost at all in the last 3 months the good news is that I have not gained so I'm still at 50lbs gone. I'm still determined in fact I'm more determined. I'm right now recovering from an infection that just got crazy bad. I've been under the weather since the start of July but didn't know about the infection until mid July. This illness has made me more determined to loose weight because I don't think it would have been as bad if I was smaller in fact I'm almost sure of it.  As a type 2 diabetic it's harder for my body to fight off an illness  and I have no doubt that if I was at a healthier size I wouldn't be a diabetic at all..   Anyway bloggers that's whats going on
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10 years

What were your dreams in high school? What are they now? I recently went to my 10 year HS reunion, and let me tell you bloggers life today is not at all what I thought it would be 10 years ago. I guess I had dreams of just being ... different. A different size, a different career .... a different me. But high school was a long time ago and the real world is nothing like sitting in your room dreaming. The real world is full of valleys, mud-hills and every once in a while mountains. In other words there's always something or someone that you have to go under or around or even right though and often it's messy. Sometimes I'm sad that my life aren't those dreams that I dreamed through my HS years. That I'm not a famous writer (despite my spelling and other English errors) or that I haven't traveled to an exotic land. Adulthood has a way of killing dreams. It's so easy as a child to close your eyes and image the world as your oyster but than childhood ends and life happens. Illness, bills, jobs, death.... Life happens, and in the mist of it dreams get lost. But I realize that I still have today and if GOD is willing than I have tomorrow as well. So what are my plans for the next 10 years? I don't know exactly but I know that I want to be happy and I know that I don't want to be anything different than me.... just more me


Dreams

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.
Langston Hughes
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Fat Fight

SOooo I stopped WW... and working out for about 2 weeks. I am so sad about that because I gained and now I have to move backward. It is so hard to re-start a diet, but today was my first day back on and I did ok...not as well as I wanted to but I now have the ball rolling and once again I'm back to the fat fight. Sad I have to re-lose what I gained plus more to reach my next goal but happy because I know that I can do this.
Mieka 1 comment

Heel Envy (Hating)

I am so freakin hating on all thease high, freak 'em, heel wearing chicks. I can not wait until I drop another 50lbs b/c I am so doing the heel. I'm going to be 6'5 in them but oh well. I love sexy give it to me heels. lol The reason that I'm not into wearing them now is because I just think they are too much for me at my height and size. (Nothing agaist the big girls who are... hunnie more power to you
I am so hating on Ms. Naica in these wedge blue suede heels.
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Happy Fathers Day!!


The dictionary has many definitions of the word FATHER
fa·ther
a. To acknowledge responsibility for.
b. To act or serve as a father.
c. A man who raises a child.
d. any male acting in a paternal capacity
Of course there are more but these are the definitions that describe my relationship with the word father

My father was strong, he was there was I was a small child
And he was there when I was not so small but yet still a child
He was there whenever I needed him to laugh and cry with me, there when I learned to cook, willing to taste my first cake (which was purple) :)
He taught me how to drive, was patient and willing (even though I was really bad at it)
He was my great uncle, not a relation that people first think of when the word father comes to mind, but he was mine. He taught me that men should be responsible and be there. I learned from him how to say I'm sorry when I'm wrong, to love even those who hurt me and to still laugh and smile even when the world is crazy and those you trust have let you down..
And although I'm sometimes less than nice it is my uncle who is responsible for the times that I am nice. He taught me how to be giving and to be kind
He was my father, my dad my papa and any other word to describe a man who takes care of a child, loves a child and teaches that child.

Miss you more everyday and yet I miss you EVERYDAY the same.
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46




Everybody who have ever been on any type of diet knows that the numbers on a scale can either make you so happy you feel like crying or make you so depressed you cry. Well bloggers guess what? Really guess... Those numbers have made me beyond happy. 46LBS LOST that's right 4freakin6 pounds. I am so happy right now.... Still Fat but moving in the direction of fit. 4lbs more until I reach my 50lb 3 month goal. Let's get it!!!

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Recycled ex

So I recently hung out with an ex and well I don't know if the single life is getting to me but I kinda was ummm feeling him? lol the crazy thing is that I was never that into him. I mean we dated for 6 months and the whole time I was just ....killing time. sad I know, but sometimes a girl needs to get flowers, go to dinner and a movie....With a Man (sorry bestie but you know). Lately I have been feeling more Ms. Mieka (33 lbs will do that) and I think that its the confidence more than anything but the dudes are in my face HARD and it's crazy to  me that I have looked to the past for  a date. I don't know bloggers I am definitely going to explore the possibility of an ex becoming a now.
more
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Still Fat


I know I have no posted anything lately about living the fat life....SO.... ok so I went off WW and I'm just getting back into the swing of things. The good news is that I have not gained, my total loss is still 33lbs and I have a freaking waist line right now... It's been a while yall. I feel so good about me right now. The bad news is that I have not lost anything in the past 3weeks (namely b/c I haven't been doing right) and starting up again is hard. I'm not over eating but I know that I'm not in my point range either. So my 3month goal was 50lbs and my 3months are not over until June 4th so I sill have time to do what I need to. 20lbs in a month means that I can't at all go over my points and mother's day right around the corner too :( oh well I didn't go into this thinking it was going to be easy I went into this knowing it was going to be hard so lets get it!!
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