Still


It's been a while since I worte a Fat blog... Well I'm still fat lol... and pretty. When I was growing up my grandma used to say..not simply to me but she just used to say "You can eat yourself ugly" I am a firm believer in this. Have you ever seen an ok looking fat person and thought to yourself 'She/He would be so pretty/handsome if he/she lost some weight?' Well I have. I haven't reached what I call fat/ugly but I do believe that I would be much prettier if I was smaller... In fact I know that I would. This summer I lost 60lbs, when I go back and look at those pictures I realize that what my grandma used to say is true you really can eat yourself out of good looks. So how am I? Fat and pretty BUT not as pretty as I could be.

4 comments

sunshinestar110 | March 22, 2011 at 10:26 AM

wow...that just made me cry a little. I thought I was the only person who felt that way. I look at myself and say if i just lost a couple of pounds I could be much prettier, my face would be slimmer, my waste, my clothes would fit better. I agree i see myself as pretty but not full potential of pretty.

Pamieka Adams | March 22, 2011 at 1:03 PM

Thanks sunshine. I have been told all my life 'Mieka you're pretty, but you could be so much prettier' and I guess it stuck. So here I am 27 and I'm still fighting a war with my emotions, confidence, and my ideas of pretty.

Traci Lavette | March 27, 2011 at 8:03 PM

I'm with SunshineStar on this one, Pamieka. I hate that you feel that way. Words are so conditioning and they last with us all our lives. My weight has fluctuated ALL MY LIFE and each time summer rolls around, I'm thinking another year, Traci?! Really?! Now, I don't always feel the best about myself for being asked when I was younger, "what you gon' do about all that ass?!" and all the comments about it being too big to the point that I used to wear things to cover it up. You are beautiful. I'm not just saying that. I'm looking through your pictures and you are beautiful. It's sad that the people closest to us say the most fucked up stuff that follows us through our lives. Then they wonder why at various times in our lives, we've sought attention in all the wrong places for the sake of acknowledgment and acceptance. I've been thinking of joining weight watchers because I want to lose maybe 20 pounds. If you want to do that we can be each others support from a distance. Let me know because I'm all about building each other up.

There's so much more I want to say but at the expense of you telling me to come over here no more with a damn book, I'll close it up now. LOL!

XOXO

Pamieka Adams | March 27, 2011 at 10:44 PM

awww Thx Traci. I am actually a pretty confident person, I feel like I have had to become this way. It's just that I have my days and right about now I'm having a few of them.I don't regret that I grew up plus sized I just feel like this need to change..at least some. I thought about weight watchers too, but haven't made up my mind about it yet. Tomorrow I plan on getting a digital cam and start doing some daily journaling about my weight and a full body pic once a week. Thx for ya words hun.. I'm sure that you can get that 20lbs off.. and I would love the support thing.